Friday, April 26, 2013

National Infertility Awareness Week...
I couldn't let this week go by without mentioning NIAW.
I have to admit, it's a little strange to be speaking about infertility, given my current state-and how I found myself here.  
I've mentioned before that I feel like my place in the infertility community is kind of uh...tarnished??? 
Maybe I'm not really infertile...
Or not as infertile...
But then again, we all know its not about comparing battle wounds, it's about supporting each other and creating a community where we can rely on each other when we're down...and that's what I love about the infertility community, but especially in the blogging infertility community.  This is where I found support (unbeknownst to so many of you...) when my journey started.  
The one thing I will comment on, because I'm feeling now, although it applies to a different, yet similar situation now with the complications that have arisen-
Infertility isn't about accepting 
Infertility isn't about seeing the bigger picture
Infertility isn't about being happy with what you have
Infertility isn't about only being given what you can handle
And maybe I'll get into deeper feelings another time, but those same messages are being thrown at me now with the potentially devastating diagnosis of this baby, or just the fact that things may not possibly end up the way I had envisioned.  

Is it so wrong to grieve?  
Is it so wrong to worry?
Is it so wrong to cry?  
  Is it so wrong to want to be "normal?" 
Is it so wrong to be angry?
Is it so wrong to want things to be different? 
Infertility robs you, infertility changes you...
Not everything is sunshine and unicorns.
Yes, one day, you'll see the light, and be thankful...
But until then...

Photo: National Infertility Awareness month! Share, re-post, spread the word about -Infertility Awareness-

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